Fall to Pieces
by Amanda Marie Johnson
Summary: After the loss of her daughter, Buffy Summers drops into a deep depression and mental state. Who else to pull her out than William? RR


NEW STORY GUYS, YAY! OKAY, WELL, YOU KNOW THE DRILL, R/R, THANKS

". . .Juliana! No! Someone help her!" Buffy heard the screaming inside her head again as she rocked back and forth in the corner of her room. "Stop it" Buffy mumbled. It had been three years since the accident and Buffy remained in the Sunnydale mental hospital. The tragic events a short time before shutting down her mind and putting her in a schizophrenic and agoraphobic state. "You can't touch me" the blonde said as he continued to rock back and forth. "Stop it, stop it, stop it. . ." as she rambled on, her head buried in her knees the door to her room opened and Dr. Lucas, the only doctor who Buffy seemed to trust, even a little bit entered.

"Hello, Buffy, how are you today?" he asked, kneeling down beside her.

"Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it" Buffy continued her ramblings and rocking.

"It's time for your meds, Buffy" Dr. Lucas said handing her the small cup with the two white pills in it. Three years and still Buffy didn't know what they did, but somehow they gave her a sense of security so she took them. "Good girl" Dr. Lucas said. "Are you gonna join us for group today, Buffy?"

"They can't touch me," Buffy said. "They can't, I-I'm too far above them, they can't touch me."

"Buffy, I asked you a question" Dr. Lucas said sweetly.

"Where's my daughter?" Buffy asked, looking at him. "We. . .I told her that I'd take her to the park, sh-she loves the park. Where's my daughter?"

"Buffy, we've talked about this before. You're daughter's dead, she's been dead for three years" Dr. Lucas said tenderly. It had, and remained hard on Buffy, losing her daughter. It had totally thrown her over the edge and Dr. Lucas knew that bringing up death around her could result in restraint on the blonde.

"Liar!" Buffy screamed and moved to the right side of her room "You're trying to trick me, I know it. Y-you're lying."

"Buffy, sweetie, calm down" Dr. Lucas said carefully. He had had to put her in restraints too many times and he hated doing it. "Just calm down now."

"Leave me alone, just leave me alone" Buffy begged, burying her head in her knees and rocking back and forth. Dr. Lucas sighed and got up.

"Buffy. . ." he said.

"Leave, leave, leave, leave. . ." Buffy rambled and he left the room.

Joyce sighed as she gathered her things together. She had grown very restless since her daughter was admitted into the mental hospital and all she wanted was for her to be all right. When she was admitted, Joyce thought she'd only be in there for a couple days, a couple weeks at most, but a week turned into a month, which turned into a year and her hope grew frailer by the day.

"Hey, mom" Dawn said.

"Hi sweetie" Joyce said, getting the last of her things together.

"Are we still going to see Buffy today?" Dawn asked.

"Yeah, later though. I have to run to the gallery for a while. I'll be back in like an hour okay" Joyce said and kissed Dawn. "Be good, and your dad said he would call today, so, answer the phone okay."

"Okay" Dawn said and Joyce left. The tragedy with Buffy's daughter and then with Buffy tore apart Joyce and Hank's marriage and they got divorced a while later and have been ever since. Dawn sighed and went into the kitchen to get something to eat. All of this had been hard on her too. She never expected her big sister to get locked up in a mental hospital. Nevertheless she was handling it well. As she opened the cupboard to get something to eat the phone rang and she answered it. "Hello?"

"Hey Dawnie" Willow, a friend of Buffy's said.

"Hi Willow" Dawn said. Willow had been great through all of this. She had helped out Joyce a lot and had remained Buffy's friend, as did Xander.

"Are you going to see Buffy today?" Willow asked.

"Yeah, when mom gets back from the gallery" Dawn said. "You wanna come?"

"Yeah, when should I meet you at your place?" Willow asked.

"Uh...in like an hour. Or you could come over now and hang out. I'm bored" Dawn said.

"Okay, I can do that. I'll see you in ten minutes, Dawnie" Willow said and Dawn smiled.

"Really, cool, I'll see you then" Dawn said happily.

"Okay, bye" Willow said and hung up the phone. Dawn was happy Willow as coming over. She hated being alone. It just reminded her that Buffy wasn't home.

Buffy had moved from the floor to her bed now and was sitting there staring at the wall. Dr. Lucas had learned that if Buffy said she wanted to be alone, it was best to leave her alone. He'd leave and come back an hour later and usually she was mellowed.

"Buffy?" he asked, coming into the room. "How are you doing?"

"I'm thirsty" Buffy said plainly, not looking at him. He sighed with relief. At least this episode was over. Sometimes Buffy was perfectly normal. She could have a conversation, she could walk around, she could do anything normal, but most times she was balled up in the corner of her room.

"Okay" Dr. Lucas said. "I'll get you something to drink. What would you like?"

"Juice" Buffy said, still not looking at him.

"Okay" Dr. Lucas said. "I'll be right back." He was gone for about five minutes and came back with a cup of juice and some pills. It was again time for Buffy's meds. "Here you go, Buffy, it's time for your medicine." She took it without hesitation as she always did and drank down all the juice. Just then someone knocked on the door and came in and whispered something to Dr. Lucas. "Okay" he told the woman and she left. He looked at Buffy. "Buffy, your family's here and your friend. Do you want to see them?"

"Yes" she said, looking at him.

"Okay, I'll send them in" Dr. Lucas said and left the room. Buffy had missed her family. The loss of her daughter was obviously too much for her to handle. When she was lucid she wished she could go home and be normal again, but then something she couldn't control would take her over and she'd have no choice but to obey. She got off her bed and went over to the place that was once her mirror and remembered how it was removed. It had been removed a couple weeks back. She was no longer allowed to have mirrors. One day she had started smashing them. She didn't want to look at herself. Looking at herself reminded her of her daughter. She sighed and straightened herself up as best she could and sat back on her bed.

"Buffy" Joyce said as she, Dawn and Willow entered with the doctor.

"Mom?" Buffy asked as Joyce, Dawn and Willow came closer.

"Hi sweetie" Joyce said, sitting on the end of Buffy's bed. "How are you?" Buffy didn't answer. She never answered that question. Party because she didn't know herself and partly because she didn't want what she said to be used against her. She pulled her knees to her chin and held herself there.

"Buffy, we brought these for you" Dawn smiled and showed her the flowers. Buffy smiled at her little sister.

"Here, we can put these in the vase here" Dr. Lucas said and took the flowers from Dawn, filled the vase with water and put the flowers in it.

"Thank you" Buffy said and Dawn, Joyce and Willow smiled at her.

"Ms. Summers, a word" Dr. Lucas said and he and Joyce stepped outside.

"How's she doing, Dr. Lucas? I mean, really?" Joyce asked.

"Sometimes she seems to be getting better, and then other times. . .it's like. . .we can't reach her. I think I know what might help" Dr. Lucas said.

"What?" Joyce asked. "We'll try anything."

"We need to get Buffy outside. Show her the real world. It might be the only way for her to rid herself of those demons she's been holding onto" Dr. Lucas said.

"How are we going to get her outside? She's agoraphobic" Joyce said.

"Yes, that's why we have to work slowly. A little bit at a time" Dr. Lucas said. "I'd like to work with her, if that's all right."

"Yes, of course. I just want her better. I just want to take her home" Joyce said.

"That's what I want to" Dr. Lucas said. "We'll begin tomorrow. Now I hope you understand that it might take weeks, even months to get to that first step."

"I understand, just please, try to help her" Joyce said.

"I'll do whatever I can" Dr. Lucas said and Joyce looked through the window on the door at her daughter who was still sitting on her bed, her knees up to her chin.

"Just help her" Joyce said and sighed.


End file.
